Tag: love

Potluck for Choice Stirs Up Support

By: Jeremie M. Jordan and Bella Vilshanetskaya

On January 22nd of 1973 it was decided that banning the right to choose to have an abortion violates the constitutional rights of women. Thirty three years later, we are still arguing about it, but recently a change has come along.

On November 7th, the state of South Dakota will be deciding whether or not to outlaw abortion. Because our campus is peppered with wonderful women who believe in women’s rights, this past Friday, October 6th, there was a Potluck for Choice held in Spalt 007. Great effort was put in by the Womyn’s Center coordinators Beth Jones and Meredith Root. The 25ish guests in attendance were asked to donate at least one dollar to help support Planned Parenthood of South Dakota to fight this preposterous proposal. The food was reportedly yummy as well. On the subject of the ban, a student in attendance said, “The implications of the government putting laws on our bodies go far beyond one’s personal stance on abortion.� It’s not about babies, it’s about choice. Small people behind big desks shouldn’t be able to make our decisions for us. It is one of the goals of the Womyn’s Center to educate not only females, but the entire campus about issues concerning and affect- ing women today.
20061013-porluck.jpg

Pro-choicers have their cake and eat it, too.
Photo by Kari Thompson

The abortion ban would outlaw all abortions other than the follow-ing circumstance: If the pregnancy endangers the life of the mother. Silly excuses such as other health concerns, cases of rape, and cases of incest will not be tolerated. (I wonder how the supporters of this law would feel if their twelve or thirteen year old daughter was sexually assaulted and got pregnant as a result.) To make sure that nobody is doing anything that they shouldn’t be, a doctor could face five years in prison for performing an illegal abortion. In February, the South Dakota Legislator passed the abortion ban with ease. In order to avoid a lawsuit that would cause the courts to endlessly rehash Roe v. Wade, pro-life supporters collected signatures and the ban was placed on the ballot. In the most recent poll found, 47 percent of South Dakota voters opposed the ban, 39 percent supported it, and 14 percent stand undecided. If the ban included exceptions for rape and incest, support would be 59 percent. If the pro-choice population dominates the results, the pro-life population will include exceptions for rape and incest and put the issue up for vote again. continued ….p13 The state of the Womyn’s Center of Antioch is not alone in this fight. Nationwide, over 200 potlucks have been held so far and more are being planned. Potlucks for choice are not the only opposition to the South Dakota abortion ban out there today. The holders of the potlucks want us to think of our sisters, our aunts, our mothers, our daughters (for those of us who have offspring), our cousins, and all of the other women in our lives and how this will constrict their rights. Abortion is not a method of birth control but it needs to remain a choice. The pro-lifers seem to be catching up to us; we need to find larger artillery. Perhaps the Record’s “Munition of the Weekâ€? can help us out with that. Just kidding, we don’t want to shoot them, we just want them to see it our way.

Bright pink armbands and their explanation were handed out at the potluck. Betty Friedan, a student at Wellesley, organized a facebook group called “I’m Wearing an Armband for Choice�. The group suggests selling armbands made of hot pink cloth at a suggested donation, the profits of which will go to the Planned Parenthood Action fund of Minnesota and South Dakota, to help educate the voters. Donations from the “Armband for Choice� and the Potlucks will be sent to:

PPMNS Action Fund
Attn: Allison F.
1200 Lagoon Ave.
Minneapolis, MN 55408

Personal donations can be sent to the address above as well. If the ban passes in South Dakota, the trend will waterfall through the rest of the country. Our beloved president supports this ban. How would he feel if he was pregnant? Mr. President would probably reply “I’m a man, I can’t get pregnant.� He would become a prolifer in a heartbeat if one of his precious baby girls got pregnant. First he won’t send them to war, next he will be protecting them from the world (more so than he already does). He is a man behind a big desk in a big white house who thinks he can control the choices of women, whose population he couldn’t begin to count (he can’t count that high). Educate yourself, so that you can know where you stand on every issue that affects you and those issues which you feel passionate about.

Freaks and Geeks

or Where the hell was everyone last Friday night?

By the cooperative council for a non-wack social scene
Photos by Kari Thompson

Last Friday night’s party had a slew of campus Freaks and/or Geeks crawling out of their respective crevices stashed throughout the dampest dungeons, and most studious corners of Antioch Campus.

Birch space was transformed into the middle school auditorium dance space of our dreams, and I personally found it hard not to revert to the pre-pubescent wallflowerish tendencies of my youth as my eyes were met with a bevy of familiar faces transformed into caricatures of S&M sex sluts, and D&D dorkbags. Special shout outs go to J Switlick- D.J. spinster extraordinaire for holding it down on the tables for upwards of 2 hours, and playing my hearts secret anthem- yeah, never mind all the posturing, this reporter is searching for a Real Love, just like Mary J. circa 1995.

20061013-freaks.jpg

Megan Homewood & Whitney
Stark reveal surprising inner life

But was the party as Michael Khayat put it so eloquently “Lameo, same-o, no one to blame-o, just like taco bell- different party, same ingredients?� Or was it another shining example of the stylish debauchery which permeates the underbelly of our fine school? It’s kind of like the way people try purposefully to show up late to things so they won’t be the first ones there, but if no one comes, there is no party. It’s a dangerous cycle, people become disillusioned by the perceived sameness of Friday night parties, and numbers dwindle- yes loyal readers, skin will be bared, pelvises will be ground into each other in a rhythmic humpy fashion, first years will inevitably fall down, but just like vaginas- no two parties are the same. We need numbers, turn out, seriously what else is going on in our sleepy Midwestern hollow? It’s worth showing up if only to see Nate Love dance, and with a broom no less! I bet you’re sorry you missed that.

Some interviewees were more optimistic- or drunk, 2nd year transfer Shauna Pearson reminisced, “ I had a great time. Tequila was the devil, Jameson was like a sub-devil, but Tequila was actually Satan.� Other part goers were impressed with the effort put into outfits, Patrice Wyman remarked- “ Carrie had a sweet ass outfit, her glasses were fucking sweet… I got really shit faced.� It goes w i t h o u t saying shit faced was a theme last Friday night, I heard at least two tales of near death experiences. One party goer recalled- “A thump, followed by a red head on the ground.� And another terrifying tale of death defiance had a certain saran wrapped third year dangling precariously from a third floor window of North, before she was rescued by another heroic third year who was thoughtful enough to pull her back in through a second story window. Yes communityalcohol, plus irresponsibility equals blatant displays of stupid. It’s all right, you can hate me, I’m bulletproof.

For the name dropping portion of my article I will start with Wendy-Lynn Zeldin, resplendent in classy black dress and cute little bow- I have no words, other than: call me. James Kutil, creative as always was begging for a kick in the pants as he shook his cute little ass all over the dance floor, accompanied by Patrice “Gramma� Wyman who aside from being adorable was eerily reminiscent of the crazy cat lady I grew up down the block from. Meredith “lady on the streets, freak in the sheets� Root wielded a boa with uncanny expertise as she shook her shit with assassin like precision. First years Jeremiah and Riley impressively shined the dance floor with a rhythmic compulsion that’s still sending chills through my girly parts, and Walid- Oh Walid, who knew six simple words could drip like poetry from your lips and straight into my subconscious, when the world is silent I can still hear you saying “Can I roll up on you?� what a gentleman. Other notable guests included a goose, a rat-tailed sailor, and Captain Kirk, Chris McKinless’ nipples were unfortunately nowhere to be seen. Mariel Traiman had to say of the evening “ It was fun. People looked good. I got to make out…a lot.� Her positivity is always appreciated in the sometimes sea of emotive ambivalence, for example when questioned about his feelings on the evening Wesley “Danger� Hiserman had only to say: “The cigarette wasn’t worth 25 cents�.

Not to be forgotten were the 4 (by my slightly intoxicated count) women in lab coats. I had no idea Antioch’s pre-med program was so prolific, I felt like I was dodging speculums and bio-technology like Steve Lawry dodges direct questions from the student body… j/k. Please don’t shut us down. Basketball shorts, and domesticated animals on t-shirts were also in high style, Whitney Stark’s “I <3 Horses� t-shirt still stands out in my mind. Jelesia Clyburn coerced the night into a beautiful finish with her enviable music selection skills, and sent the Antioch freak and geek population stumbling drunkenly back to their beds, to rest their sweaty little heads on their bed bath and beyond pillows, and slip off into the dream world. I feel that a good party is truly revolutionary. Every time we get together and listen to the wisdom of top 40 hip hop and R&B jams, jump, spin, grind, and slink surreptitiously into corners to make out with fervent passionwe prove that we can transcend the bullshit. Every party is direct action- when we come together over the common goal of fun, when we dance in the face of adversity, when we showcase blatant displays of deviant sexuality and dissidence from the status quo of “college party culture� we become stronger as people, and as a community. Do not write off parties as “same shit, different costumes� embrace the silliness, and the opportunity to uphold a legacy of true radicalism- for every time a boy slips on a skirt, or some youngin’ gets their first taste of non-monogamy, every time someone finds themselves comfortable enough to dance like a spaz face with a group of co-conspiring spaz faces, we are truly (to quote Gandhi) “Be(ing) the change we wish to see in the world.� Riding off on my high horse into the sunset- this is the Cooperative council for a non-wack social scene urging you to stop being such a cynical shut in ass hole and come out and dance, cuz you might think you’re to cool for school, but you’re probably not. Except for maybe a couple of you.20061013-freaks2.jpg

Keri gregory looks for freakish slam dunk

Nookie with Niko

Hello. . Before I my start my over-sexed advice column I’d like to take a moment to thank Danny Solis. He took the time to post a beautifully written letter on Pulse, even after moving away and graduating. Danny was a leader in this community; it’s good to see him still involved. We need more people to set it up. I’d also like to thank those having a dialogue about it. So many people are afraid to voice their opinions now, but it’s what we’ve got to fight with. Staff, the students, faculty, and we are Antioch. It is our responsibility to preserve our college. Not to mention we are in a crucial point in our history and we have the chance to shape that. Step up, fight back, and hold on to the Antioch that the generations know and love.
20061013-nookie.jpg
Okay, okay onto the sex…

This week I bring you scary sex urban legends and rumors, and the truth behind them in celebration of Friday the 13th. As someone born on the 13th and had many wonderful birthdays on this so called unlucky day I hope to use this as a time to dispel the myth of danger that will ensue on the 13th. I understand the creepiness, but it seems to me our society perpetuates fear of Friday the 13th. Paraskevidekatriaphobics is the name for those irrationally afraid on Friday the 13th. Yeah they even have their own name. Did you know that some building even leave out a 13th floor? 13 is considered a creepy number all over. Before I get carried away though, here cum the top 8 sex urban legends!

#8
Male-bodied people getting pregnant? Ever seen the movie Junior? It’s a comedy about Arnold, California’s governor,, who gets knocked up. I’m sorry but I just don’t think he could actually handle it. This well-known hoax traveled through cyber space and fooled thousands. Thought they aren’t considerate enough to say male bodied over men. Check out www.malepregnancy.com to get the full scoop. The site is pretty convincing, but still a fake. Needless to say male bodies can’t get pregnant, yet. Maybe one day, but for now only female-bodied people can carry children.

#7
May I have your attention please! Ogling breast does NOT increase men’s life spans. An email referencing a fake article in the New England Journal of Medicine started going around in 2000. The article spoke of study that confirmed that men who ogle breast have increased life spans. Come on, couldn’t they think of a better way to make this behavior seem okay? Needless to say it wasn’t too hard to figure out it was a fake. The email can be found at: urbanlegends.about.com/library/weekly/ aa072600a.htm?once=true&

#6
I heard lots of bad ideas about different types of contraceptives, like reusing condoms. Though this one is about Mountain Dew. Yeah that super sugary Pepsi product. Apparently sugar and caffeine can keep you from getting pregnant. If that were true you would think my two cups of coffee in the morning would do the trick. The idea is that Mountain Dew decreases men’s sperm count thus making pregnancy impossible. It’s only take one sperm to get someone pregnant. This one’s been around since the 90’s. I know I heard it growing up. Millions of youth and young adults actually bought this. Here’s another blaring reason to have comprehensive sex education in high schools. But that’s a whole other rant.

#5
Another internet rumor was about getting head. A rumor popped up claiming that women who suck cock on a regular basis have lower rates of breast cancer. So basic idea is women get out there, suck a lot of cock, now! Obviously men wrote this and the breast article. Another fucked up way to justify objectifying and using women. I heard this rumor in school and different variations, such as semen is very healthy for you. When it comes to giving and getting great head the only benefits is reduced stress, pleasure, and hopefully an orgasm. Personally I think those are more than enough.

#4
Did you happen to see the fake Puma ads that came out a while ago? Check them out. This sprung up and caused quite a ruckus. Nice shoe’s, but what’s that on your leg?

#3
People love their butts. People love sticking things in their butts. Despite there being a big anal taboo, many people love to stick things in their assholes. If there is one thing I hope people will learn, it is that if you are going to put anything in your butt it MUST have a flared base. The anus will literally suck in a toy, and you’ll have no way of getting it out without going to the doctor. Despite many rumors doctors have found over 140 different objects inside people’s asses. Such as light bulbs, plantains, curling irons, baseballs, shampoo bottles, a cattle horn, a frozen pig’s tail, and a tobacco pouch. For the sick and twisted perverts, like me, who want to see the whole list go to: www.well.com/user/cynsa/newbutt.html

#2
Would you believe it if someone told you that there are actual people fighting against breast-feeding? Stating it’s an “incestual and immoral perversion.� At least a good portion of America bought this prank. Could you imagine? Seems to me we have better things to rally against, especially at Antioch.

#1
Masturbation will make you go blind or grow hair on your palms. Who hasn’t heard these rumors? For the record this is absolutely not true. Masturbation is great and healthy; everyone should do it all the time. Literally. Maybe Antioch would be a better place if people just got off more often!

See you next week!

The Dried Baby Organ Dispensary

Welcome to the Dried Baby Organ Dispensary. Here at the D.B.O.D. we pride ourselves on collecting and recommending only the freshest of jams to smoke your babies to.

20061013-telepathe.jpgTelepathe- Farewell Forest EP
[ The Social Registry :: 2006 ]

In the dead of night, deep in the forest; in the shadiest of groves, the neglected, lost souls of this earth gather and cause a mighty din. And not in an A.A. meeting kind of way. This is sheer debauchery, a feast of sin even. It is urgent and sensual, incomprehensibly dark and devilishly alluring. Like swimming through the folds of the velvet blanket of night, and drowning, and sinking into it, endlessly…… And then waking up inside of a jack-o-lantern. Awful, demonic creatures are dancing around you in circles and laughing beautifully. Everything seems fluid and starts to blur, and you find yourself lost but comfortable, and the shadows creep over your mind like a coma. And then you wake up again, alone in the rain. The wind is blowing and the leaves are falling and you are staring at the face of eternity. It looks kind of like movement stuck inside of an aging polaroid photograph and…. then it’s gone. That’s it, party’s over. The way the details of a dream slip away from you as you watch the sun drift up over the horizon, it just goes away.
20061013-fujiya.jpgFujiya & Miyagi- Transparent Things
[ Tirk/Word and Sound :: 2006 ]Fully krausened. Chic and funky enough to turn David Bowie’s head. I have a creeping suspicion that these people work at the cloud factory.
20061013-boards.jpgBoards Of Canada- Trans Canada
Highway EP [ Warp :: 2006 ]

There’s this Mogwai song that says that if stars had sounds then they would sound like Mogwai. Eh. I’m going to disagree and say that I think that if stars had sounds then they would sound like Boards Of Canada. Really though, it sounds like stars; stars exploding, or stars making love, you know, all that general kind of star stuff that stars do. I had a vision one time when I was tripping that in the future I would mate with a very tall, purple alien woman who could float. I mean, you know, it probably wasn’t a woman at all, I mean it was an alien and all that. But you get the idea. Anyways, I love Boards Of Canada. Although the music is almost exclusively digital, there is something about it that is more organic than dirt. Vibrating, breathing, neon tinged dirt. All over you. It sizzles and glitches like a robit in an acid bath as it interfaces with the hardware of your soul, and it will teach you the songs of the stars. Two thumbs up.
20061013-time.jpgTime-Tested Quality Blends
White Magic- Through The Sun Door
EP [ Drag City :: 2004 ]

Some strange pastoral romance, written in blood and scattered about the plains for the wind to find. The wind found it, and recited it to the hills, and sang it to the sky, and screamed it across the deserts. And someone just happened to be there with a recording studio. It’s like magic and shit! The music on this album conjures the feeling of a train swaggering across some green, vast expanse. These are songs of love, transfiguration, and departure. Think Joni Mitchell worshiping Baphomet for roughly ten years and smoking just enough punk rock to get really dirty in it. Really an absolutely remarkable album. Straight-forward enough to be widely accessible and crafted with enough innovation and skill to please even the most pretentious of ear drums, I feel like I see most people enjoying this recording. I’d also like to use this space to plug White Magic’s forthcoming first ever full length release, “Dat Rosa Mel Apibus�, available November 14th. Don’t worry, you folks at Drag City can just send me a check later.
Ivan Knows Best….
20061013-ooioo.jpgOOIOO- Taiga [ Thrill Jockey :: 2006 ]

Wood Pipes:
It’s raining candy in the jungle, and all the tigers are turning neon colors like fruit stripe gum. But, really though, who the shit is this crazy fucking Japanese woman and why does she keep screaming?! Is it Lisa Frank? Does she have any opium? No silly, it’s just Yoshimi P-We from the Boredoms. And as to what the shit she is screaming about, I have no idea, I think it’s Japanese. But regardless of what language it is it’s wild and I think that I like it a lot. I feel like Hansel and Gretel at the same time on some crrrraazzzy rainforest spaceship made out of candy. Is Yoshimi some kind of wicked witch or something? Maybe, but whatever, this spaceship tastes hell of good. So where are we going, anyway? Well, to the funky rainbow colored dancehall built on clouds and reggae. Duh……..

Ivan:
This ceedee attracted my attention immediately given the fact that it began with an actual staccato of drum beats; this almost caused me to actually move somewhat on my seat. Quickly, however, came the horribly sad whining high pitch voice of a young woman. This complaint, though short, was immediately overwhelmed by two to four lines of response by strong low voiced women.

Another portion began with the unmistakable sounds of a galloping horse, followed to the best of my imagination by those of a screeching frog. Then some clear rhythms managed to catch my attention, basically the line sounded DA DA DEE DEE, DA DA DEE DEE, DADADEESEE, DADADEEDEE…The rapid succession of rhythmic sounds eventually compressed and produced in me a feeling of confinement and resentment. I was expecting the DA DA DEE DEE, to become as expected DA DA DA, DEE, DEE, DEE…DADEE, DADADA…But this expectation was for nought. This cede did certainly make an effort to communicate something important to its audience, unfortunately I could not begin to understand what that might have been.

Having thought a few minutes since this last sentence I do come to the conclusion that such a ceede’s raison d’etre might indeed be to demonstrate to educated and long-lived listeners that they are clearly unable to cope with evolution in the musical world. I, however, intend to expose myself further to such art in order to determine exactly what these shiny round objects intend to do to our civilization.

“Bring me some cereal”
– Wood Pipes

Horrorscopes 10-13-06

By request, a very special Horoscope for this week’s edition of the Record. Ladies, Gentleman, and Gender-Neutral or Othered persons, I bring you…Horrorscopes. Yes, I predict your death for my general amusement and your torment. Just try not to die this week; I’d rather not get sued.

Heart Heart, Amy Campbell, Horrorscope writer and mysterious mystic – haunting Main Building since Summer 2005.

*Please note that this week’s horoscopes are completely satire and I hold no malice towards anyone, nor am I plotting or actually predicting anyone’s death. Anyone who dies under such circumstances does so completely by coincidence, and not through my actions of writing a horoscope.

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 22-JANUARY 19)

Life is a bitter pill to swallow, good thing death also comes in convenient pill sized form as well. Have you considered hemlock? I hear all the cool kids are doing it.

Tarot Card: Five of Cups – Suicide via imbibing or consuming of liquids or pills. You may be so incompetent that it’s an accidental suicide where you’ve participated in reckless behavior that you damned well know would get you killed.

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 20-FEBRUARY 18)

Surprise!!! You’re dead!!! Your death will be totally random and quite unexpected. ComCil might have something to do with it, and it will probably be a totally arbitrary decision. Don’t blame me when someone stabs you with a protractor. You probably deserved it.

Tarot Card: Wheel of Fortune – Death by circumstance, don’t walk in front of Twinkie trucks or participate in Breath-play with a chicken anytime soon.

PISCES (FEBRUARY 19-MARCH 20)

You can sleep when you’re dead. Until then, if you sleep the clowns will come into your room, and begin gnawing on your body until you die if you sleep. Needless to say, you’ll die of insomnia, but only after you go crazy and take your friends with you.

Tarot Card: Nine of Swords – When will this nightmare end?! Four years, maybe five, you’ll get your degree eventually.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19)

*Crush* Your heart is broken. You become extremely morose and die because you refuse to leave your room to eat, bathe, or use the restroom. I hope you live off campus, like we need more haunted rooms.

Tarot Card: Three of Swords – Life isn’t worth living without love, so I’m going to lock myself away and listen to sad love songs until I die.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20)

You’ll die on your way to co-op or vacation. That’s right, as soon as you get the hell away from Antioch you will keel over. Might as well stay here and rot.

Tarot Card: Six of Swords – Row, row, row your boat *glub, glub, glub*

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 21)

You’ll be kidnapped. Unfortunately you aren’t worth much so your wallet will be stolen and they’ll throw you in a ditch somewhere in the hills of Tennessee where no one will ever find you. You’ll crawl around in the wilderness for awhile until a vulture eats your liver. Maybe you’ll fall off a cliff first if you’re lucky.

Tarot Card: Eight of Swords – Tied up and thrown away like a bag of garbage.

CANCER (JUNE 22 – JULY 22)

Somebody gets so sick and tired of your whining that they stab you in the back, multiple times. No one goes to your funeral, and no one cries.

Tarot Card: Ten of Swords – [think Psycho shower scene]

LEO (JULY 23-AUGUST 22)

Like Gemini, you get to die tied up. Unfortunately it’ll probably involve some rather inconvenient circumstances, like dying during kinky sex. There’s no way your parents will be able to take this news, so not only will you die, but your father will have a heart attack and your mother will probably have an aneurysm.

Tarot Card: The Devil – Death by Lust. Makes you wish you weren’t such a pansexual, talk about embarrassing obituaries. And you thought your horoscopes were ba-a-a-a-d.

VIRGO (AUGUST 23-SEPTEMBER 22)

You’ll die peacefully in your sleep, because you led an uneventful life. Loser.

Tarot Card: Four of Swords – I heard Virgo McVirgin died this week. Who was that? Dunno, who cares. Wanna crash the funeral? Sweet!

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 23-OCTOBER 22)

Don’t fall down!!! You’ll die by falling, probably while you’re telling someone not to fall down. Hopefully it won’t be on your birthday. On a related note, tell Joe Cali Happy Birthday on the 17th, and tell him not to fall down.

Tarot Card: The Tower – Cause I’m freeeeeee, freeeee falling.

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 23-NOVEMBER 21)

You’ll maim yourself horribly and end up bleeding out by the side of the road or getting a serious infection. I recommend not taking up bungee jumping, sword play, or fire eating. Ever.

Tarot Card: Five of Swords – Don’t cry for me, some people have a thing for amputees. Oh god… why is it green and smelly?

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 22- DECEMBER 21)

You’ve got a battle to fight and you’re going to rush off to your death to fight it! Dying for a cause, how romantic. Hope it’s worth it.

Tarot Card: Knight of Swords – I’m going to save Antioch by strapping a bomb to my chest. *Ka- Boom!*