Antioch love is a magical, magical feeling but where can you find sound advice on this campus about how do deal with your relationships? This week for Valentines Day The Record did your work for you. The Record presents Lessons in Love with Bill and Corinne Whitesell.
What advice can you give Antioch about love?
Bill: None everybody is so individual. Ask my wife.
Corinne: Well they went around and did this survey of people who were married more than 50 years to find out what the secret was and they found out they were more miserable, but they were able to put up with the misery better than others, they eventually just abandoned the survey.
Bill: That was very helpful to realize that people who managed to stay married 50 years weren’t all happy all the time, all through those 50 years.
Is there any secret to staying in love at Antioch in particular?
Corinne: Well we’ve had our differences about Antioch….
Bill: Well our secret was that she left Antioch after we had been here for 20 years, and lived in Alaska for a while.
Corrine: Yeah we had an interstate marriage for a while
Bill: That was 16 years, she came back and it was like starting all over again. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. I think if people live together 24 hours a day they’ll get on each other’s nerves, you need to take a break now and then. If you love somebody don’t expect them to be perfect, but love them anyway, cause you’re not perfect and they love you.
Corinne: I think love is a set of behaviors not an ooey-gooey feeling. If you love someone it’s how you treat them.
What do you think is one of the best gifts that you can give to celebrate love?
Corrine: Well that would be a first
Bill: Well the standard gifts are candy, flowers, jewelry; I never give any of those.
Corrine: the first year we were married my birthday, his birthday, Christmas, and our anniversisary are all in the same two-week period and I didn’t get one thing for any one of them. I thought ‘I can’t believe this…’
Bill: The secret is even if they keep insulting you, you still love them.
Do you think it’s possible without commitment to love someone?
Bill: Well I think love is a commitment, just remember that you are not perfect, and they are accepting that, then you have to accept their (imperfections) too. Emphasize the things that you like, I guess just think positively Then you can just keep thinking about what you loved about them in the first place cause it’s probably still true, you just come to take it for granted too much.
What do you do if there is someone that you love and they don’t love you any longer, but your still in love with them?
Bill: Well I guess you better grit your teeth, you gotta go back and re-kindle the love or else give up and find someone that looks like them.
How do you get someone to love you?
Bill: I don’t know the answer to that…well I guess be yourself and maybe you become a person that someone will love and find a person who is the type of person who would like you. I guess the point is have a lot of friends and maybe one of them will stick.
How do you know that you’re in love?
Bill: I guess you sorta find out when your apart if you keep thinking about that person. If you can’t get them out of your mind then you’re probably in love. ‘In love’ is kind of a bad term anyways, cause you feel like you have no control over it, but you have control over your feelings to a large extent.
How do you know if they’re in love with you? Well, you can ask them (laughs) but that is sorta a touchy subject isn’t it.
Although Bill is a certified expert in stars he may also be an expert in love too. We hope that if you are lonely during these lovey-dovey days that you remember to love yourself first.